Doing What They Do

For all of you die-hard Cool Rule Blog followers, you may recall that at least one or two posts here have been dedicated to my starry-eyed expectations for decent photos of my children. The classic, 'Cheesy Peas' post in which a seemingly wonderful gift of a 'mummy makeover and family photo shoot' went disastrously wrong. And then there was the school 'Photo Opportunity' which had me abandoning a perfectly good photo shoot and running for the hills (plus a strong coffee and a stack of custard creams).

So imagine my delight when, on Twitter, a local photographer, despite having read my accounts of photo shoots from Hell, actually offered to visit me and the Tots for the very purpose of getting some 'nice, natural pictures'. Hello? Was she from this planet? Didn't she know both of my children had an in-born-photo-shoot-intolerance-type-thingy from which they would never recover? Clearly she did not.

But then I closed my eyes and imagined all the possibilities. There were my children . . . dancing through fields of cornflowers. Skipping through tall grasses. Flying high on a swing in the afternoon sunshine. Running to hug their mother in the park. I was absolutely certain that once we deducted the use of white photo studio walls and big scary flashes on tripods, my Tots would be modelling material.

And this photographer lady, Simone Rudolphi of SR Projects, seemed to agree. We tweeted and tweeted about the things we could do and finally got together one freezing Sunday December afternoon to see what happened.

Big Tot has me under the thumb as usual

Big Tot, of course, had been briefed about what would be happening that day. He likes to know his schedule and so he had it all planned out. Simone would arrive, Big Tot would befriend her with alarming rapidity. There would be coffee and therefore biscuits which he would monopolise immediately. The camera, which he knew he was not allowed to touch, would become a source of intrigue and unlock his ability to charm Simone until the camera was not only allowed to be touched, but also held and fiddled with. Plus, he would wear his best, smartest clothes, despite having had the phrase 'natural photos' explained to him repeatedly and vehemently.

And all of this unfolded as planned, keeping Big Tot happy and Simone on her toes. We went out for a walk down to the local farm shop and although we had to settle for deserted industrial estates instead of fields of cornflowers, and a grey, murky sky instead of afternoon sunshine, we just got on with things. If this was going to be natural, then we had to go with whatever the world threw at us, didn't we?

Simone did a grand job. She certainly got the measure of Big Tot within about thirty seconds and figured out rather swiftly that Little Tot needs to be given his space. I felt like I was just spending a day with an old friend. She snapped away so that we hardly noticed and never made a big issue of having a camera.

My very own poster boys

She told me, as we were walking, that she was intrigued by the natural way people moved, talked and interacted. She was particularly interested in photographing children because of the challenge but also the potential to get that one shot that can show their innocence, their strength and their beauty all in one go. "Children don't have the inhibitions of a grown-up," she said, "They just do what they do."

And there were my two, just doing what they do. Big Tot playing 'Temple Run' all the way down to the farm shop. Little Tot insisting on pushing his Action Men (inexplicably named Dory and Max) along in his buggy. Refusing nose wipes, demanding snacks, jumping in puddles, fighting with sticks. This was the reality of my Sunday and I was glad to have Simone there to capture it.

Action Men enjoying the fresh air

So this is one blog post about a photo shoot that does not end in tears. It actually ended with two very tired Tots, happily munching toast in front of the telly and the central heating cranked up. Oh, and a Mummy having a sneaky cuppa in the kitchen, wondering how to tell the world how fab Simone Rudolphi actually is.

Go well,

Abi


To find put more about Simone Rudolphi and her wonderful photographic services, find her on facebook.com/SRProjects4Photography or follow her on Twitter: SR_Projects

Want to celebrate happy living with your toddler? See Abi's amazing range of Cool Rule products at www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk, join in the fun on Facebook and follow her on Twitter too!

Cheesy Peas

I should have listened to my inner-shudder when I first opened the email. It was from my Mam. She was excited. I could tell by the extravagant use of exclamation marks and capital letters. 'Here you are!!!! ENJOY!!!' she beamed brightly across the digital cosmos.

It was a Groupon. But not just any Groupon.  It was a Groupon claiming to be worth two hundred and forty five pounds . 'Family photo shoot with hair and make-up for one person'. And that one person just had to be the mum, didn't it? I couldn't quite picture Big Tot with a bouffant or Little Tot sporting a touch of lippy. Maybe the hubby, with his annoyingly long silken locks would fancy an up-do but I was fairly certain this makeover was aimed at the maternal among us. What normal, every-day mum wouldn't fancy a bit of glamming-up as a welcome break among the drudgery of domesticity?

Look how much fun I could have!

Erm, me.

I have to admit I rarely leave the house without the sacred application of mascara but an actual make-over? Not on my top ten list of things to buy a Groupon for. And when I checked the website of the company generously offering this Groupon my pessimism deepened. Most of the makeovers seemed to feature a basque or two. Some spiky high heels. Some curious choices of 'artistic' lighting. But surely they wouldn't expect me to partake in this? Especially with a grouchy toddler and a child who thinks he owns the world tagging along.

But this was a treat from my Mam and we would cash this Groupon in with total enthusiasm and gratitude. If nothing else, it was a reason to get out of our pyjamas before eleven in the morning (oh yes, we are embracing the summer holidays wholeheartedly) and maybe, just maybe, we'd get proof that we do, sometimes, remain in the same room as a whole family, unequipped with iPads and Nintendo 3DS's.

So, after a heated near-divorce with the satellite navigation system, we finally found the private house where our photo shoot was to take place. We were ushered into a (very) posh reception room by a (very) pretty lady with our many bags of pyjamas, teddies, Mario costumes and plastic swords (can you tell I'd already planned how this photo shoot was going to go?).

Something like this would do nicely

I tried to explain to Big Tot that the hand-carved, soapstone chess pieces may look like toys fit for a five-year-old but were, in fact, 'very dangerous grown-up things that may explode upon the touch of a child', whilst the hubby negotiated with the pretty lady how long the makeover would take and consequently how long he would have to entertain the Tots at the nearby park. "It shouldn't take longer then twenty minutes" was her advice. Ok then. Either I was so beautiful I needed only a miniscule amount of make-up or I was a lost cause. I didn't dwell on which one it might be.

Luckily the pretty lady was actually very good at her job (hence the prettiness, most likely) and she had me spruced up in no time. This did not stop the hubby from returning ten minutes early and demanding to know why my transformation was not yet complete. The second half of my make-over was spent further confirming my suspicion of the exploding grown-up chess pieces and allowing a toddler to shove a mirror literally in my face at every given opportunity.

Now it was time for the actual photo shoot. The Tots were decked out in multi-coloured stripey tops and jeans. The hubby and I in jeans and white T-shirts. Obligatory bare feet, of course. The PJs and costumes were for later, when we'd happily and joyfully change and show what a fun-loving, adapt-to-anything-type family we were.

Big Tot kicked off the proceedings. He was instructed by our entirely pleasant photographer to kneel down, stand up, put hands in pockets, smile and say 'Cheesy Peas!' many, many, many times. He did as he was told but alas the smiles were without soul, without that wicked Big Tot glint that we all know and love. Maybe he'd relax in a minute.

Cheesy Peas - would they make you smile?

Then Little Tot shuffled onto the scene. The photographer went with this, which was good, and the hubby and I looked at our boys with adoring eyes. How natural. How lovely. How in-the-moment. But then Little Tot was given similar instructions on how to sit, stand, lean, smile etc. We didn't panic. Not yet. Yes, Little Tot may only be two years old and may be notorious for never, ever doing anything other than what he damn well wants, but this photographer would be well versed in the world of toddlers, wouldn't he? He would know how to extricate a natural smile, an effortless scene of play and brotherly adoration.

Or not.

As soon as Big Tot got bored and strutted over to me for yet another explanation of why, exactly, he was here, Little Tot flipped out. The flashing lights, the white walls, the lack of actual family in this family photo shoot were freaking him right out. It was tears and tantrums all the way now.

So we all rushed onto the scene. The nearness of his family would sort Little Tot right out and assure him everything was normal and conducive to joy / cheer / anything resembling a smile. But nope. It is true what they say about children tuning in to the stress of their parents. I already knew the hubby was in a storming mood, which cranked up my hysteria a notch or two which, inevitably, gave both Tots a reason to grab, cry, scream, stomp, ask to play on the iPhone etc etc.

My last-ditch attempt was to suggest to the photographer that perhaps we could give the Tots a chance to calm down, get some toys out and just go for some more natural shots. That might be the only way forward now. But he continued to ask us to lean in a bit more, move a hand, smile wider, and shout out 'Cheesy Peas' with ever increasing gusto.

Needless to say we did not unbag the plastic swords or Mario costumes. The pillow-fight-in-pyjamas scene I had developed in my head would sadly have to wait until another day. By the time another family was practically banging down the door of the photo studio to tempt their own luck, Little Tot was past himself and Big Tot had a permanently bad attitude. My own attitude was tested when the photographer suggested we pay one hundred pounds for a CD of appalling photos, and further still when he explained that that 'free' print included in the Groupon would cost £10 to be posted to our home. Or, he added helpfully, we could pick it up from the house in a few weeks. I remembered how close the satellite navigation system had come to being thrown out of the sunroof and politely declined.

So that's why I should have listened to my inner-shudder right at the beginning of this tale. My little family is simply not cut out for photo shoots. Or that particular photographer was simply not cut out for my little family. Truth be known, it was probably a bit of both so, for now, I'll continue to spontaneously snap my boys on the iPhone and allow Mario moustaches all round. It's quite clearly the way forward.

The Tots working the camera as only they know how

But thanks Mam. It really was a lovely thought.

Go well,

Abi
xxx


Check out Abi's amazing range of happy living products for toddlers and parents at www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Follow Abi's up-to-the-minute parental observations and wisdom at facebook.com/thecoolrulecompany and on Twitter, @coolrulecompany.

Birthday Blog Post No. 7

As part of The Cool Rule Company's 1st birthday blog series, I'm so chuffed to introduce a fantastic guest post. It's Sarah Loveland, a very talented photographer with a passion for bringing the joys of photography to anybody anywhere. Today she gives us some hints and tips on photographing your toddler - enjoy!


Hi, I'm Sarah. I was fortunate enough to meet Abi from The Cool Rule Company when I popped along to a Mumpreneur meeting in Consett which was staged by Derwentside Enterprise Agency. I had previously seen the Cool Rule Book on Facebook so it was great to have a proper look at it. I loved the fact that parents could stick their own photos into the book.

Sarah and the Cool Rule Book which caught her photographer's eye

As a professional photographer one of the things that I do is teach people how to take better pictures. In addition to lessons and workshops I have created a range of fun and informal photography lessons in a box. One box in my range is the ‘How to Photograph Your Toddler’ box.

Sarah's genius photography lesson in a box

If you're a parent, have you often struggled to photograph your little one now they are at an age where they are on the move? Smaller cameras often have a delay once you’ve pressed the button and by the time the camera has taken the picture the child has moved - how frustrating is that?!

Here are a couple of pointers for photographing your children . . . 

• Where is the light? Try not to shoot towards a window or the sun. Keep the light to one side or just over your shoulder. If your child is evenly lit the picture will be better.

• What’s in the background? Make sure you have moved the washing! Sometimes by taking a step to the left or right you realise what needs to be changed in the background.

• Try and tell a story. In the Cool Rule Book you will want particular pictures to show special things. Think about how you can get your picture to tell the story of what is going on. 

Most importantly, have fun with it and keep it fun for the children! They will get bored with you trying to get the perfect picture if you go on at them to sit still and smile

I would like to wish The Cool Rule Company a very happy birthday!

Smile!

  













Thanks Sarah. Personally, we love your photography lessons in a box range and definitely think the 'How to Photograph Your Toddler box' is a perfect partner to the Cool Rule Book!

If you'd like to contact Sarah or want to find out more about her fantastic services and products, here are the details you need:

sarahloveland.com
facebook.com/SarahLovelandPhotography
facebook.com/Photographylessonsinabox

If you're curious about the wonders of the Cool Rule Book and the rest of the fantastic Cool Rule range, skip on over to our website: thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Photo Opportunity

When Little Tot's howling echoed through the streets at 8.15 on a damp, misty morning, I knew it was going to be one of those days. Not only was he howling, he was writhing. Not only was he writhing, he was clawing. I tried to lock him in one of my best motherly embraces, but I think we all know that it has to be one hell of an embrace to prevent a toddler from howling, writhing and/or clawing.

At least we'd reached the middle of the queue now. It had crossed my mind to cut my losses and leave. Of course, I would have breezed past the other parents in a manner which suggested I really didn't care and that I had something better to do when I was actually inwardly doubting my abilities as a Supermum and on the brink of a major sobbing sesh.

Was it really that important to get a photo of the Tots together from Big Tot's school photographer? Didn't I already have hundreds of perfectly good photos of my two gorgeous boys? Yes of course I did. But being a true Brit I didn't want to miss out on a free photo session so I'd turned up to stand in the drizzle on a Friday morning.

Looking around I couldn't understand why none of the other toddlers were acting in a similar manner. Couldn't these kids show even an ounce of boredom to support Little Tot? I'd reached the point in the queue where it was necessary to discard buggies as they weren't allowed in school so Little Tot was stuck with me. I couldn't let him down on the ground due to the aforementioned shitty weather (remember he was dressed up to the nines for the photographer) and because he was still predominantly crawling everywhere.

Things were getting very cramped. Big Tot had been kicked in the head twice (his head was at optimum kicking level as far as his brother could see) and now I had two howling boys to deal with. Oh what I would have done to be one of those calm, serene looking mums with their calm, serene looking tots just happily perched on a hip. My children have never perched on my hips. Ever. For starters I seem to produce giant babies which tend to turn into giant toddlers and secondly they seem to be possessed with a character made entirely of fire and brimstone. This is not conducive to happy hip-perching.

Anyway, my own fire and brimstone incited me to stick it out until the end and we finally made it into the makeshift photo studio set in the school library. The caretaker (oh what a lovely man) had helped me with coats and zips and snotty faces and suggested that it might all work out fine, the bright lights might distract Little Tot into smiling for the camera. He even crossed his fingers for me.

As we approached, the photographer tried to hide her alarm but her raised eyebrows betrayed her. Little Tot was utterly appalled at the positions we were trying to wrestle him into and by this point too far-gone into the tantrum spectrum for us to get any type of 'natural' shot. Big Tot, bless him, tried his best to goad his brother into the spirit of things. But as he was lacking in any promising toy offers or chocolate-themed goods, Little Tot was having none of it.

And then I remembered that Big Tot's Cool Rule Book was a little treasure chest of beautiful photos. Beautiful because they represent everyday life for us and where we are right now as a family. They're not set up, they're not forced. They are real. And not only do they help Big Tot understand our family rules and expectations, but one day I will look back on them and fondly remember all the tantrum-taming I did. Won't I?

Nevertheless, it was with a heavy heart that I dropped Big Tot off at school and trudged home with a disgraced Little Tot. A stack of custard creams and a strong coffee were my first priority as I got through the door and then an equally strong word with myself about the day so far. You are not a bad mum. You tried something you knew would be challenging and it didn't work. Big deal. Get over it and move on.

And move on I did. Because later in the day my hubby and I were called into school to collect Big Tot who had fallen in the school playground and apparently broken his foot.

Now therein lies another blog post.

But let's just say that the day was not short on dramatics. Or emotions. Or custard creams.

Oh, and just to make myself feel better I made sure I was the first to write on Big Tot's plaster cast. Well, nobody else was going to say it for me, were they?

Go well,

Abi


Find out more about The Cool Rule Book and a whole range of other fantastic products to transform day-to-day living with a toddler by visiting Abi's brilliant website, www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk