Happy Birthday to Us!

Well, The Cool Rule Company has made it to its first birthday! It started smiling months ago, it's finally sleeping through the night, has had a good few teething problems but hey, it's just about on its feet and making its own way in the world! Next thing I know, it'll be a toddler.

Any excuse for cake

This time last year I was pulling all the strands of my genius business idea together. The Cool Rule Book trial was done and dusted (with brilliant feedback, of course), the final draft was being lovingly printed and bound, the blog was up and running and the website was coming along nicely. There was only one thing left to do . . . register with the Inland Revenue.

That landmark call was made one dark, thundery afternoon whilst Little Tot was sleeping and Big Tot was at school. I gave my details to the lovely man on the other end of the phone and waited for his heartfelt congratulations. So I was most disappointed when he just asked me if I'd partake in a telephone satisfaction survey. Satisfied? No I bloody wasn't! Didn't he know the hours of toil I'd put in to get to this momentous day?

Luckily most other people I've met since then have been a tad more supportive. I've met some amazing parents trying to be the best mums and dads they possibly can be. I've been lucky enough to have the help of some brilliant business mentors, who have been so generous with their time and advice. And the number of talented, motivated, creative businesswomen I have met has astounded me. I mean, they're everywhere. You're probably sitting on one right now.

Me with the infamous Big Tot and my mentor, Anne

 

 

 

 

Maybe it's a sign of the times but it seems that women today are totally going for it. The women I've met over this year, through mummy-type-networks and right-on-women-type-networks, are calling on their creative powers to get that work-life balance right. What they don't know about combining family, work, health and wellbeing is, quite frankly, not worth knowing. And the important thing is, it's a path they've forged themselves.

I'll put my hands up and honestly say I am still forging my path. I know exactly where I want to be (cue the gentle rolling of waves, rays of sunshine, palm trees swishing etc etc) but the path to get there, considering I'm carrying two unruly Tots, a grumpy hubby and a stack of self-help books, can sometimes get a bit rocky.

I could Cool Rule on a beach

And that's why meeting all these amazing people over the last twelve months has been so inspiring. Yes, their businesses are important. And yes, some of them have some truly magnificent products and services out there. But they're also just normal women, trying to make it all work.

So I've had a brainwave. Let's bring them all together to spread the Cool Rule love. I've asked all of them to write a few words about their businesses throughout our birthday month of July. So, if you want to find out about some fantastic services, some genius products and perhaps get a few pearls of womanly wisdom then this is the place to be.

Go well,

Abi
xxx

The Boredom

Appearances can be deceptive.

I may be sitting here in my pyjamas, sipping a lemon and ginger tea and peering through a pair of reading glasses at the laptop, but please, don't let that fool you. The highlight of my day may well have been a cowboy puppet's rendition of the Toy Story theme tune at a 5 year-old's birthday party, but don't let that mask the more sophisticated interactions I have most recently been involved in.

In fact, during this particular month, you could even go so far as to assume I had a social life - one that expands beyond the usual soft play haunts. Amazing, but true.

I was starting to show the first symptoms of a very serious yet astoundingly common disease which, in the soft play circles we call 'The Boredom'. It happens to us all. Even if your children are brilliantly entertaining and continuously surprising (which my two are, fully certified), The Boredom can still set in. Even if you're well up on your positive psychologies and can meditate your way out of a nuclear holocaust, The Boredom can still hook in its claws and drag you down. And it's not pretty.

Kids aren't the only ones who get bored

So I was just starting to feel that familiar clawing when I decided something had to be done. I needed to clock up some serious anti-boredom points. And what better way than to start with my birthday?

I used my best bossy voice to insist the hubby got the day off work and packed the family off to the seaside and the aquarium for the day. I decided nothing would stop us from having fun, not even the weather, the overdraft or the potential for tantrums. We had cake (the detox is over, after all), we had wind in our hair and we had sand in our boots. Me: 1, The Boredom: Nil.

Not long after that, I spotted another opportunity on the horizon. My Mam was driving up to the Highlands of Scotland to visit family and really, how much difference would it make to her if I tagged along with her two grandsons? Surely the 8-hour car journey would be made more interesting with a few sugar-induced screaming fits and a record-breaking game of I-Spy? And her X-Trail does an easy 70mph so we were outrunning The Boredom good and proper.

Back home and back to reality. But not for long. I'd spent the last millennium (or so it seemed) organising a trip of the most professional nature for me to go to London Book Fair. I'd been advised by my lovely business mentors to do it, to find some exciting opportunities for my utterly marvelous Cool Rule Book. So off I went. I mean actually on my own, sans enfants. Can you believe it? I spent a whole four days away from the family nest and went swanning around with literary types at Earl's Court, grabbing goodie bags and learning about hybrid authors. Get me.

The Boredom was re-thinking its game plan.

But I had another trick up my sleeve. The theatre. And not just any old show. I was going to see my very own brother in The Reduced Shakespeare Company's Complete Works of William Shakespeare! There was much hilarity, much beaming pride and much in the way of after-show dinner and drinks.

That's my brother, in the middle

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that's, Me: 4, The Boredom: Nil.

And just to put a very succulent cherry on a gorgeously sticky cake, on the last evening of this month, I am off to the theatre yet again. And my succulent cherry will be . . . Derren Brown. You know, that marvelous bloke who is otherwise known as a dark manipulator of magic and mind control. He is most definitely one of my favourite people to watch. And watch him I will! Whilst The Boredom shivers outside in the theatre's gutters, I will be marvelling at the mind tricks of Mr Brown in his brand new show, 'Infamous'.

Oooh, exciting!

I may have had a whole year's quota of social activity in only one month but it was worth it to remember there is a world outside of dirty washing and difficult meal times. Now I am ready to smile at the splattered yoghurt and laugh in the face of the broken washing machine . . . I took on The Boredom and I came out on top.

Oh, and I remembered to count my blessings. 1, 2, 3.

Go well,

Abi


Find out the ultimate way to fend off The Boredom with your toddler by visiting www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Check out the tour dates for The Complete Works of William Shakespeare and see my brother be very, very funny! http://www.reducedshakespeare.com/tour-pages/schedule/

Find out about the next London Book Fair at www.londonbookfair.com

Marvel at the mind tricks of the master that is Derren Brown: www.derrenbrown.co.uk 

To Boost or Not to Boost? - Day Two

Surprisingly enough, after Day Two of my crazy Body Boost shenanigans, I am feeling very full and satisfied. Not too long ago I polished off a plateful of cod, salad and quinoa and I have to say it really hit the mark. That may have something to do with the fact that I was so hungry I could have eaten a scabby horse, but nevertheless, I will go to bed with a happy tummy.

Breakfast: eggs, tomato, cucmber & olives, Lunch: Butternut squash soup & salad,
Dinner: Cod, Quinoa & roasted veg & salad

It's been another busy day of supermum-type activities, the highlight of which may have been a rather terrifying trip to Tesco. Not terrifying in any exciting or dramatic way. Nothing that's going to make any local headlines. But terrifying because of the devastating effect that it had on my bank balance.

"I'm just popping out to get some basics," I hollered to the hubby before rugby tackling Little Tot into the car seat (he is oh-so-good at the archy-back thing). And in my mind I had developed a brief shopping list of basic things I needed if I was going to do this 10-day detox any justice.

I'd already bowed out of the optional list of health supplements which detox guru Helen McCrea had given me. When you're wondering how on earth you're going to pay the gas bill, it's never a good idea to splash out on digestive enzymes.

And because I'm vegetarian and not tempted by the majority of protein options on Helen's 'allowed' list, it was time to stock up on fish and eggs. And a barrel full of leafy greens, of course.

So I swished swiftly past every single Easter egg offer in the entire building (much to Little Tot's dismay) and selected only the healthiest detox-type items which I felt sure Helen would pat me on the back for, had she been tagging along.

Supermarket Sweep

Only two days before Tesco had swiped a load of cash from my bank account after I'd done a mega-family shop. So, I sailed up to the checkout to pay for my haul of body boosting goods, knowing that I only need worry about myself. Just a few quid would see me through the next few days of detoxing.

Just a few quid? After the smiley Tesco lady had hammered my debit card for fifty five pounds, I staggered out to the car park in a state of shock. Fifty five pounds?!

I was just thankful Little Tot can not yet understand such concepts as eating on a budget and would not, therefore, breathe a word to his father on our return. The receipt went quickly into the bin. The food was packed into the fridge in record time and I turned the subject to football as the hubby walked into the kitchen. Works every time.

Never mind. Tomorrow is another day.

Go well,

Abi


Transform the life you share with your tots and visit www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Find out about Helen McCrea's genius fitness and detox programmes at www.femalefitness.co

Back to Bad Hair Corners

Not quite sure how to start my first blog post of 2013. Shall I speak of the multitudinous empty chocolate wrappers haunting my memory and - more importantly -  my hips? Or of the insanely colourful and annoyingly noisy large plastic toys which now adorn every aspect of my home? Or, perhaps, of the tax return aching to be done in time to avoid an evil late-filing penalty? No, I shall tell you I had a wonderfully warm and cosy Christmas followed by a simple, at-home New Year. All was well. All is well. And things are looking good for 2013.

Big Tot was back at school today. Thank. The. Lord. And the teachers, of course.

I must admit, we have had a lovely time together over the festive season. We have indulged in 'Despicable Me' to the point of being able to quote 97% of the script. We've joyfully snubbed the chocolate laws of our household. And we've invented a game called 'Christmas pile-on' which generally involves holding Mummy down and decorating her with all available festive trimmings from our 75p tree.

Our favourite moment in Despicable Me

And we've also had a few surprise circumstances which left me with a challenge or two to endure. Lack of car to name but one (the Punto shunned its MOT requirements, the cheeky, obstinate little thing). Lack of hubby to name but another (he's holding down two jobs, bless him, both with many, many extra festive hours). So for the most part, I've been house-bound and child-bound and looking, always, for ways to see the bright side.

Luckily, I have two partners in crime when it comes to optimism-seeking. It may not always appear so. For I am fully aware of what percentage of my time is spent avoiding or enduring or helplessly observing tantrums. Little Tot is nearly twenty months old now and rapidly approaching that unique point in his life when he is not just allowed but expected to be terrible. And let's not forget he is learning from the Master. Big Tot still refuses to relinquish the Crown but is astoundingly generous when it comes to teaching the ways of the tantrum.

But despite all of that, my Tots know how to shine a big old light on the dark moments. Or even just the busy, stressed, not-in-the-moment moments. Just the other day I was stepping / tripping through the living room / toy apocalypse, striving to put a wash on, tidy up, cook dinner, run a bath, change a DVD, scrape up play dough, wipe off snot etc etc and Big Tot shouted a question at me. I tried one of my non-committal nods and hoped he'd back off but, hey, I should know by now he has no concept of how to politely treat impolite grown-ups. And he shouted the same question again.

"Why does it?"

I stopped, washing basket in-hand, Little Tot at-leg and asked with a sigh, "Why does what, do what sweetie?"

"Why does that toy say 'Back to bad hair corners'?"

"I have no idea sweetie. Now I have to go and . . . "

"Mummy! Whyyeeeee?"

"Sweetheart, I have to go and put this washing in the machine and then I will come and see you . . . "

"But whyeeeeee? Why does it say 'Back to bad hair corners'?"

By this time Little Tot had wrestled down the washing basket and was frolicking in his own dirty clothes. Big Tot was wide-eyed and earnest and giving me his full on I-want-an-answer-right-now-or-I'm-going-to-tell-everyone-what-a-crap-mummy-you-are attitude. And it's during these times I know there is no turning back. I choose to invest in the moment. I choose to dive entirely into Big Tot's world and treat it with the importance he so constantly works to convince me of. So I knelt down, rearranged my face into a look of eager curiosity and I listened.

"Now, what are you asking me. Please ask me again."

"Why does that toy say . . . 'Back. To. Bad. Hair. Cornerrrrrs'?" I tried to ignore that he was - at four years old - employing that tone of voice usually reserved for teenagers who want to imply their parents are the most stupid beings ever to inhabit the earth.

I looked down his pointed finger and across the room, to the offending toy. And that's when, with a rising surge of laughter and an inexplicable, immediate need to hug my son, it clicked. It was a talking, Fisher Price Batmobile.

I walked over to it, picked it up and returned it to Big Tot. He gingerly pressed the cute mini Batman to a resounding, clarifying, growling voice: "Back to Bat Headquarters."

And that, ladies and gentleman, is how a child can bring you back to the moment.


Have fun in 2013!

Abi


Find out how to live in the moment more often with your children AND tackle discipline too!
Just visit www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

The Cool Rule Song and an Ironing Board

Just now, whilst I was receiving Tweets, drinking coffee, planning dinner and filing some papers, I looked up the word, 'Multitask'. Of course I know what it means.What parent doesn't? But I was curious. Can they possibly define such a term without mentioning the vocation of parenthood?

It appears not. For Oxford Dictionaries Online defines it as follows:

Multitask:  Dealing with more than one task at the same time
Parenting skills such as multitasking and concentrating amid distractions are easily transferable to the workplace

Hands up who's good at multitasking. I bet you're not as good as me. I bet I'm the winner (too much time with Big Tot, sorry). Honestly though, sometimes I find myself doing so many things at once I consider finding the nearest circus so I can borrow a glittery leotard. And maybe a head feather or two. It would certainly give the Tots something to talk / burble about.

I mention this, not because it's a particularly new or interesting thing. Let's face it prehistoric parents probably had a few things to juggle what with the attacking of beasts and picking of berries. It's just that recently, I seem to be taking multitasking to a whole new level.

The other day, after setting up the train tracks for Big Tot and presenting Little Tot with a plethora of soft play options which might distract him from ripping apart said train tracks, I decided the growing mountain of ironing could be ignored no longer. I set up a little workhouse in my tiny, tiny kitchen, firmly locked the safety gate and set to work.

Now I like ironing. There's something about the curling, rising steam; the rocking, rhythmical creak of the board; the soothing flowered scent of just-washed clothes. But lately (I probably mean for the past four years), it has been harder to enjoy such simple pleasures. Because I am constantly interrupted by the alarming cries of a toddler who can't find a toy or a baby who has eaten an entire pot of soil, I see ironing as a task rather than an activity. And by that I mean a task that can nearly always be put off until another day. Well, this was that day.

For some time now I've been trying to think up a Cool Rule song to sing with Tots at local toddler groups as a means of shamelessly plugging The Cool Rule Book to their parents and carers. A girl's got to earn a living. And, as I worked my way through that ironing pile my creativity must have got a boost because after a mere two hours of smoothing the family fabrics, I'd nailed it. The Cool Rule Song was born.

The amazing Cool Rule Book!

Yes the composition process was interrupted by toddler toilet trips and broken train tracks, but, as the dictionary definition outlines, I was able to 'concentrate amid distractions'. Big Tot asked repeatedly, "Why are you singing that song? Why don't you know the words?" and I gently explained that not only was Mummy an "Entrepreneur" (which he can now just about pronounce) but also a "Creative Genius". I could have added "Domestic Goddess", "Super Mum" etc but I didn't want to complicate matters.

So, if you know the tune to "Down in the Jungle" you'll be able to pick The Cool Rule Song up straight away. Oh, and you must adopt the appropriate grin, perform funky dance moves and use props where necessary. Here we go:

CHORUS
I've got a book that I think you should see.
It's got Cool Rules in it and it's special for me.
If I follow the rules, well you wouldn't believe,
How it makes us all feel happy!

VERSE
I can  . . . 
Brush my teeth - Cooool Ruling!
Brush my teeth - Cooool Ruling!
Brush my teeth - Cooool Ruling!
How it makes us all feel happy!

OTHER VERSES YOU CAN USE
I can . . . 
Share my toys
Eat my food
Hug my friends
Sleep all night
Remember I'm loved

So now that you've recovered from the shock of how damn good this song actually is, you can appreciate, I'm sure, what a feat of human endurance it was to compose it whilst performing a domestic duty such as ironing.

Hold off on the Nobel Prize nomination though, because the real test will be during my visits to local toddler groups. As we all know, toddlers know how to give an achingly honest critique. If The Cool Rule Song supported by a variety of soft toy props doesn't cut it, then quite frankly I am back to the drawing (or maybe the ironing) board.

Wish me luck,


Abi

If you want The Cool Rule Company to visit your parent and toddler group, nursery or library, get in touch now to hear how we can offer not only The Cool Rule Song, but also a positive parenting craft activity. info@thecoolrulecompany.co.uk