All Change

It's all change here in the Cool Rule household.

After two years of balancing parenthood with self-employment I've gone and got myself a 'proper job'.

And it's not just any job either. It's the one I wanted. The one I finally worked out that I wanted after pondering over and applying for many other jobs and imagining myself in an abundance of different lifestyles ranging from top positions with ridiculously high salaries to more humble work with rather insulting salaries.

It's not that I don't adore running The Cool Rule Company (or Kelebek Art, my little arty sideline). It's just that now it's all sorted and ticking along nicely, I wanted something else. I wanted something I could turn up to each day and know I was guaranteed to get paid, hence guaranteeing the mortgage people don't send the Heavies round. Because let's face it, as a busy Mum, one cannot fit the Heavies into a complex schedule of averting tantrums, wiping dirty bots and engaging in regular existential musings.

The Heavies would have to wait

Now don't get me wrong here. Self employment rocks. I've been self employed pretty much since I left university about a hundred years ago, and I bloody love it. But now I'm a Mum and have Tots to think about, the need to have an income that doesn't come in fits and starts suddenly looks very appealing. BC (Before Children) I was quite up for spending a whole project fee on a killer pair of jeans then living on rice for the rest of the month, but for some reason you're not allowed to do that as a parent. Sad, isn't it?

So anyway I must have spent a good couple of months applying for jobs in the sector I spent ten years in BC: arts management. All was looking good. I managed to write personal statements that weren't too poncy, got my references sorted and my CV was rocking up pretty well. But then there was a big, vacuous silence and I figured I had to reassess.

Now what? What was this silence telling me?

Well, it was telling me a.) it's blinking hard to get a job these days, especially in the arts sector since it's been slashed to within an inch of its life by our wonderful coalition government and b.) wasn't that just a teensy bit of relief I was feeling? Yes, it was definitely relief. And not just relief that I didn't have to go to a job interview for the first time in fourteen years, but relief that I wasn't going back to what I used to do. I just couldn't see it happening.

So being into meditation and all that jazz, I did a bit of tuning in and spacing out and finally got a hold on what was going on. It suddenly seemed blatantly obvious to me that if there was a theme running through all of my work with The Cool Rule Company and Kelebek Art, then that theme was wellbeing.

Wellbeing a plenty

The Cool Rule Book and all of the other Cool Rule products are aimed at living in the moment with your child, enjoying every unfolding moment and relaxing into the tumultuous rhythms of parenthood so that everybody benefits.

Kelebek Art provides bespoke artwork that is focused on inspiring and touching people. I like to think that everything I create has an undercurrent of healing and happiness.

And then, of course, there was my own wellbeing to consider, which would be pretty much torn to shreds if a new job didn't allow for time with the legendary Tots.

So wellbeing was key.

And because the universe is very crafty when it wants to be, a couple of ships came in for little old me.

I was offered an admin position at a company I've been banging on the door of for quite some time now. Living Mindfully provides courses in Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction and helps people weave meditation and mindfulness practices into their everyday life to improve their mental health and wellbeing. Having been wowed by one of their courses myself, I simply couldn't pass up the chance to see how this company works on a ground-level. And with future opportunities to train in mindfulness teaching methods, I was chomping at the bit.

Aren't they lucky to have me?

And if that wasn't brilliant enough, I've also been contracted to work on a local Arts on Prescription programme, teaching art to adults with mental health issues. And oh how I love these workshops. Unlike the millions of workshops I've taught in schools and youth venues, these people are willing, enthusiastic, unlikely to swear at me, and getting so much out of it, it is truly astounding.

So it's welcome to the world of 'proper' work for me. And, because everything has its flip side, it's welcome to the world of 'utter chaos in the household'. For the three days a week that I'm out proper working, and the hubby is home doing the childcare thing, pandemonium seemingly unfolds. Upon crossing the threshold of my lovely little home, I am so far repeatedly amazed by the way in which furniture can be rearranged, toys can be entangled, fruit peel can be adorning appliances and clothes can be twisted into disturbing formations. I feel like I've walked into Tracy Emin's latest.

I guess things aren't quite this bad . . .

Whilst Emin is sadly absent, the hubby looks up from his iPad cheerfully and smiles to see me home and the Tots practically rugby tackle me into full-on floor-hugs. And, in the ways of mindfulness, I decide to surrender to the sweetness of the moment and accept the mess.

It's worth it.

Go well,

Abi

To find out about the brilliant range of Cool Rule products for parents and toddlers, just visit thecoolrulecompany.co.uk 

Sign up for The Cool Rule Company newsletter, a monthly slice of parenting magic here.

Find beautiful, bespoke collage artworks at affordable prices at facebook.com/kelebekartbyabi

Discover the brilliant work of Living Mindfully at livingmindfully.co.uk

Find out about Derwentside's fantastic Arts on Prescription course at leisureworks.net/event/294/colour-your-life-open-art-studio

Birthday Blog Post No. 3

There's a touch of magic to today's guest blog post. I'm so pleased to introduce you to Mel Rickerby, or as her customers and fans better know her, Magical Mel. I'll let her tell you all about her wonderful line of work and you'll see why I've been so lucky to know her in my first year of business.


Hi, I'm Magical Mel and I'm so pleased to be part of The Cool Rule Company's guest blog posts to celebrate its first year of business.

Magical Mel and a fantastic 'Relax Kids' book

I was so very lucky to meet Abi and discover her wonderful Cool Rule products at Cumbria Baby and Toddler Show at the end of last year. I was there in my glittery fairy wear as I run Fairy School for children alongside Relax Kids classes, parties and training.

Having worked with children for over eighteen years now I truly believe that encouraging them to open their minds and believe in themselves is the answer to their well being. Helping them to engage in their dreams and wishes and giving them tools to succeed positively through life truly has to be embraced.

Mel and a fairy helper

I was attracted to the Cool Rule products not only because of the little man peeping over the wall (which I remember from my teens) but also the terminology, ‘Cool Rules’. How wonderful if children and parents can find a way to make rules cool and gain by spending valuable time together. If my own children had been at the right age to buy the goods I would not have hesitated.

The fantastic Cool Rule range

Starting children young on positive outlooks and remembering the good things in life will only enhance their future. I love the way Cool Rule children will gain something positive to keep and take into the future with them when using the Cool Rule Book or anything else from the Cool Rule range.

I feel that my own business Motivational Exciting Learning shares a lot of the philosophies with The Cool Rule Company and that’s why I invited Abi along to Cumbrian Fairy Day 2013. This is a unique event where children and grown-ups can come along with open minds and experience lots of positive and creative activities together. Building on last year's event, it's going to be a real success and I'm so pleased to say The Cool Rule Company will be part of it.

Faith, trust and a bit of fairy dust!

I hope to work alongside Abi again in the near future and cannot wait to see her wonderful products again this year at Cumbrian Fairy Day, I wish her all the best for her future, and I just know it will be a cool one.



Thanks so much Mel. We're glad you could be a part of our birthday celebrations and you continue to inspire us here at The Cool Rule Company. We're really looking forward to Cumbrian Fairy Day too and will be reporting back here on the blog about how it went!


If you'd like to find out more about Mel and her magical work with children, just use the links below:
 
motivationalexcitinglearning.com
facebook.com/pages/Magical-Mel
cumbrianfairyday.com

If you want to browse the Cool Rule range and see why it stopped Mel in her fairy tracks, check out our website, thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Happy Birthday to Us!

Well, The Cool Rule Company has made it to its first birthday! It started smiling months ago, it's finally sleeping through the night, has had a good few teething problems but hey, it's just about on its feet and making its own way in the world! Next thing I know, it'll be a toddler.

Any excuse for cake

This time last year I was pulling all the strands of my genius business idea together. The Cool Rule Book trial was done and dusted (with brilliant feedback, of course), the final draft was being lovingly printed and bound, the blog was up and running and the website was coming along nicely. There was only one thing left to do . . . register with the Inland Revenue.

That landmark call was made one dark, thundery afternoon whilst Little Tot was sleeping and Big Tot was at school. I gave my details to the lovely man on the other end of the phone and waited for his heartfelt congratulations. So I was most disappointed when he just asked me if I'd partake in a telephone satisfaction survey. Satisfied? No I bloody wasn't! Didn't he know the hours of toil I'd put in to get to this momentous day?

Luckily most other people I've met since then have been a tad more supportive. I've met some amazing parents trying to be the best mums and dads they possibly can be. I've been lucky enough to have the help of some brilliant business mentors, who have been so generous with their time and advice. And the number of talented, motivated, creative businesswomen I have met has astounded me. I mean, they're everywhere. You're probably sitting on one right now.

Me with the infamous Big Tot and my mentor, Anne

 

 

 

 

Maybe it's a sign of the times but it seems that women today are totally going for it. The women I've met over this year, through mummy-type-networks and right-on-women-type-networks, are calling on their creative powers to get that work-life balance right. What they don't know about combining family, work, health and wellbeing is, quite frankly, not worth knowing. And the important thing is, it's a path they've forged themselves.

I'll put my hands up and honestly say I am still forging my path. I know exactly where I want to be (cue the gentle rolling of waves, rays of sunshine, palm trees swishing etc etc) but the path to get there, considering I'm carrying two unruly Tots, a grumpy hubby and a stack of self-help books, can sometimes get a bit rocky.

I could Cool Rule on a beach

And that's why meeting all these amazing people over the last twelve months has been so inspiring. Yes, their businesses are important. And yes, some of them have some truly magnificent products and services out there. But they're also just normal women, trying to make it all work.

So I've had a brainwave. Let's bring them all together to spread the Cool Rule love. I've asked all of them to write a few words about their businesses throughout our birthday month of July. So, if you want to find out about some fantastic services, some genius products and perhaps get a few pearls of womanly wisdom then this is the place to be.

Go well,

Abi
xxx

To Boost or Not to Boost? - Day Ten

Please excuse me if I write this in a slight state of euphoria. I feel like I should be wrapped in an aluminium sheet, glowing from my marathon-like exertions and grinning triumphantly at the aghast crowd.

But alas, I am alone at my laptop with a herbal tea. Well, a herbal tea and a rising sense of self satisfaction. I only went and bloody well did it. Ten whole days of wholesome, natural, purifying food. Lots of sleep. Lots of nurturing. And lots of education.

Breakfast: Eggs, strawberries & blueberries, Lunch: Veg stir fry with salmon, Dinner: Chickpea & tuna casserole, quinoa & sweet potato wedges

So what now? Well, to be honest, probably more of the same. I shall be making certain concessions (I think we all know what they might be) but mostly I am sticking to this 'eating clean' concept which Helen McCrea so brilliantly promotes. I am ecstatic with the results. I feel alert. I feel calm. I've lost a few inches and - most importantly - I've learned so much more than I could have imagined.

I'm not going to tell you it all. Helen's the one to do that. But I will tell you that what I've learned is enough to change the way I feel about my day-to-day eating habits. If nothing else, I am much more conscious about what I am putting into my body. I don't feel stressed about it. I just feel conscious.

Not an option folks

I think we've probably all giggled at that saying, 'My body is a temple' at one time or another. But hang on a second, isn't there something in that? I'm swinging round to the opinion (and yes, I have nicked this out of a personal development book) that my body really is a gift from my parents.

A gift. A treasure. In this body I can cuddle my sons. I can stroke a dog. I can see the sunrise. I can talk for an inexcusably long time on the phone to old friends (you know who you are). I can think, I can dream, I can act, I can love. This body is bloody amazing!

I have some very well-intentioned friends who gasped in horror when they found out I was going on this detox. I suppose that's because detoxes are related to extreme weight loss, and those friends don't consider me to be someone who needs to lose weight. But that was their assumption. Yes, weight loss might happen (although Helen will tell you inch loss is far more telling) but I wanted to give something back to my body after all its given me.

Bless it, the poor thing deserves to be loved and nourished. I think we'll get along far better if we can look after each other.

Thanks to everyone who has followed this blog whilst I've been detoxing . . . your support has been just the ticket. And well done to all the other girls on the 10 Day Body Boost . . . it made a big difference knowing we were all in it together.

And Helen, you lovely lady you . . . what an experience! Thank you so much and please keep doing what you do because us ladies need to learn how to give our bodies a bit of TLC.

Go well,

Abi

Keep following this blog for loads more funny and informative blog posts from Abi and share the address with your friends: www.coolruleantics.blogspot.com

Like The Cool Rule Company on Facebook: www.facebook.com/thecoolrulecompany and follow us on Twitter: @coolrulecompany

Transform the life you share with your toddler at www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Find out all about Helen McCrea's services at www.femalefitness.co

Read Helen's brilliant, educational blog about fitness and nutrition at www.helenmccrea.co.uk

To Boost or Not to Boost? - Day Three

I've been something of a detox casualty today. I was told it would happen. It's not like I wasn't warned. But blimey, when that headache hits you it is like something from a nightmare.

I've had a headache pretty much since halfway through Day One of the Body Boost programme, but that paled into insignificance once the real torture started today. I saw Helen, the mastermind behind this whole detox scheme, this morning at the school gates and asked her if it was normal. She nodded with sympathetic recognition and said, "It's the sugar and caffeine leaving your body and I'm not going to lie to you, it's only going to get worse."

Detox headache

So I kept her words in mind but didn't really think it would happen to me. I mean, how toxified could I have been anyway? I'm a vegetarian for goodness sake. And allergic to cheese! And I do yoga and meditation and positive thinking. Surely I could positive think my way out of this one?

Apparently not. By the time one o'clock came I had spent the morning chasing Little Tot around a Mumpreneur business course and deterring him from chucking toys, pens and dummies at the course leader, only to go outside and find my car battery was flat because I'd left the lights on. Nice one. I'd like to blame it on my foggy detoxing brain but I did actually do exactly the same thing last week taking Big Tot to football.

So this caused the AA man an unending amount of amusement (it was the same bloke as last week) as he jump-started the car. He chuckled away over his paperwork and I could feel the pain in my head spreading to my eyes, my neck and my shoulders. By the time I got back in the car to give it a run out and charge the battery, all I wanted to do was lie down in a pitch black room and sleep until the end of time. I soldiered further on to take a load of Cool Rule orders to the post office (can't let all those stressed-out parents down!) but then made a run for home.

The famous Cool Rule Book

Luckily the hubby was home so I stumbled through the door, begged him to get Little Tot out and put him down for his nap (I was incapable of batting my eyelashes, which is my usual ploy). I grabbed a tupperware box of some Quinoa concoction I'd made the day before, wolfed it down, drank two glasses of water and found my way to bed. I needed dark room therapy.

And it worked. Well, kind of. I don't feel like I want to die any more but the headache is still lingering, almost reminding me what it is capable of.

On the Facebook Body Boost group tonight, I find that many of the other ladies on the programme are experiencing similar things. Helen's words of wisdom to us all are: "If you're experiencing headaches or feeling yukky it's a sign that things are working. Stick with it as when you hit day four or five your energy levels will rocket, your mental clarity will amaze you. Honestly, it's so worth these few days of feeling rubbish."

I'm kind of tempted to get her to write that down and sign it in blood but maybe that's the headache talking.

Go well,

Abi

Breakfast: Salmon fillet and berries, Lunch: Quinoa and roasted veg, Dinner: Tuna salad with egg & sweet potato wedges

Discover a fantastic, funky range of happy living products for the coolest families at www.thecoolrulecompany.co.uk

Find out more about detoxing and women's health and fitness at www.femalefitness.co

If you're interested in attending Mumpreneur sessions in Derwentside, visit www.dida.co.uk/starting-in-business/

Leap of Faith

Ask me what I did last week. Go on, ask me.

Well, by my standards (and please consider at what level these might be) I did something overwhelmingly exhilarating. It involved a dip into the good old overdraft. It involved my reluctant hubby. And it involved an athletic leap of faith.

Over the past month or two I have been spending a large amount of time on the internet, a.) looking for tickets to see Derren Brown's latest show, 'Svengali' and b.) kicking myself that I did not know about the show before it bloody well sold out. Clearly I am not the number one fan I thought I was.

And if psychological illusions aren't really your thing you might not even know who Derren Brown is. Or maybe you do and you don't think much of him. Well I do think much of him. And I think the stuff he gets up to is mind-twistingly beguiling. In fact, I can often be found of an evening (my laptop pulsing in the corner with work that really should be getting done now the Tots are in bed) glued to the telly where I've come across a channel which is thoughtfully repeating a Derren Brown programme.

So why the flip didn't I know he had a show coming up? The prices of tickets on eBay were clearly surpassing my (imaginary) budget so the chance of a night out was not looking good. No babysitter. No money. No tickets.

However, being a massive believer that positive thoughts attract positive things, and having an amateur but irrevocably enthusiastic interest in Derren's very own mind tricks, I decided to give it a go. I focused my mind. I pictured the scene. Tickets in my hand. Drinks before the show. The awesome curiousity I feel as he performs. And, to hell with it, these are only thoughts after all, what I say as I meet him backstage.

Tickets. Drinks. Awe. Backstage. Tickets. Drinks. Awe. Backstage.

And it only went and bloody well happened. Thanks to a gorgeous daughter of a friend who babysat the Tots, and thanks to a hard-working hubby who was doubtful of my visualisation techniques, it only went and bloody well happened.

The show was marvellous. I mean really marvellous. Derren did request at the beginning that nobody tell anybody else the content of the show. That we should keep it a secret so as not to spoil it for anyone else who might be attending. This was a clever trick in itself. It made us feel special. Part of a secret club. It drew us together as an audience and gave us a special bond with Derren. What a clever man. That, my friends, is how you get an audience on your side.

So no juicy details about the show. But I will tell you that hanging around the stage door afterwards had its rewards. And the drizzle was a blessing in disguise as we got pulled indoors a few people at a time to see the man himself. I got into a little chat with him about NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and was also tempted to ask him to recommend a few techniques to mind-warp and thus calm an unruly four-year-old, or hypnotise a baby into sleeping through the night. But I bit my tongue. Maybe that's a conversation for the next time.

A few days later when I was flicking through my uber-glossy 'Svengali' programme, I came across a DB quote that resonated with me. And the resonation had nothing to do with psychological illusions or mind trickery. It had to do with parenting. Of course it did. That's what I do now. And here it is:

"I am often dishonest in my techniques but I'm always honest about my dishonesty."

Parents. You know what I mean.

Have fun. Go well.

Abi